dougs digs

I must preface this post with, I am experiencing one of the most frustrating and stressful periods of recent memory. I must have forgotten to pay my utility bill, because the light at the end of tunnel has been shut off.

Here's the story.

I am minding my business, trying to decompress on the way home from work. I am gliding down the hill on 10th St heading towards my garage on Wyandotte when a car races up behind me, gets right on my bumper and begins to honk the horn repeatedly. I cannot figure who is doing this or why they are doing this, but it is really starting to piss me off.

So, I turn the corner on Wyandotte (busy intersection at 5:30pm mind you). I begin to slow down and steer to the side of the road. The car racing behind me like a lunatic does the same, the driver storms out of his car, slams the door, and marches toward my car. I step out of my car and can't imagine what this guy wants.

This is where it starts to get good (I guess).

I get out of the car and the guy begins a professional cursing tirade. He called me names that I had forgotten anyone uses anymore. I asked him to calm the "freak" down and explain what his problem is. With flailing arms and beady eyes, he begins to give me some story about me driving past him and my side mirror 'nicking' his side mirror. He goes on and on and on and on about this, becoming louder and crazier by the second.

At this point not only I am starting to really feel the full effects of an emotionally draining and down right horrible 7-day stretch of my life, I am beginning to get annoyed and super pissed at this guy for accusing me of something I didn't do and wasting my time.

After I told him I didn't know what he was talking about and asked him to calm the "freak" down (for the 400th time), that is when "IT" happened. I am still not sure what "IT" was. I have never experienced "IT", but "IT" was real ! ! !

This guy steps right up to my face, nose to nose (mind you in the middle of a busy intersection), stabs his finger into my chest and say's "I ought to kick your ass ".

I snapped. Snapped. It was a David Banner moment.

All I remember at this point is him re-engaging in his professional cursing tirade, screaming at the top of his lungs, threatening to break every bone in my body; yet I really couldn't hear him (ala - Peanuts school teacher).

I just stood there; fists clinched, teeth grinding, eyes as big as tractor tires, pupils dilated, a psychotic smile stretching from ear to ear, slightly bouncing up and down, mumbling "oh yea, oh yea, oh yea, oh yea, oh yea" like Rain Man.

At this point we are nose to nose, him screaming, me bug eyed and smiling, both of us ready to throw down. I know "IT'S" going to happen and I am more than ready ! ! !

OK, short story even shorter, nothing happened. I eventually got back into my car and drove off.

For about an hour after this episode, my adrenaline was pumping in overdrive, I was shaking. It took the loving comfort of my awesome wife to eventually calm me down and bring me back to some semblance of sanity.

What is "IT" ? I have never experienced "IT". "IT" is not really a part of my character, is it ? I never would have thought I would have ever been in a situation like this. Standing in the middle of an intersection . . . waiting to fight. What is that ? ? ?

Again, I have had a miserable week, miserable. I am carrying a load of stress and aggravation (I might go in to details once this stuff ends), but am I really capable of hurting someone ? This is so scary to me, the "nonviolent/(quasi)pacifist guy" wanting to crack skulls ?

What happened ? What is happening in me ? Oh Lord help me.