dougs digs

I absolutely dread holiday parties, especially office holiday parties. The awkwardness, the hideous ‘holiday’ sweaters that look like a craft store threw-up all over them, the weird food, the weirder people, and most of all the painful small talk. I would rather be kicked in the crotch with steel-toed boots and get the pain over with than endure the slow torture of equally painful small talk with weird people in hideous ‘holiday’ sweaters that look like a craft store threw-up all over them.

This morning, NPR did a great story on how to turn these painfully awkard (and nearly unavoidable) experiences into less painful ones.

The prospect of holiday parties fill some with dread. Debra Fine, author of The Fine Art of Small Talk, shares her tips for getting through holiday parties unscathed.

Conversation Killers to Avoid

1. "Are you married?" or "Do you have any kids?" Where are you going with either one of these if the response is "No"?

2. "How's your job at Boeing, United Airlines, Martha Stewart Enterprises (fill in the blank)?" Unless you know a person well, assume nothing! Don't put them on the spot like that. Instead ask: "What's been going on with work?"

3. "How's your wife?" (She left, took all the money, the kids and got the house!)

4. "Merry Christmas!" "What are your Christmas plans?" Not all of us celebrate Christmas.

5. At all costs avoid "Is that real?" "Are those real?"